Someday, when you have time to sit back and contemplate the universe, you're going to figure out why villains like to drop people into pits. The last time you got captured, they dropped you in a pit full of hungry bears. The time before that, it was a tiger pit. Before that? A shark tank. That may seem like a hint of variety, but tanks are really just pits with delusions of grandeur and too much water. Villains and pits seem to go together like students and cheap beer. Maybe that's why this one dropped you in a snake pit.
Well, it's not the worst place you've ever been. There was that time you had to steal a box of phone cases from the mob – that was far more dangerous than this. They chased you halfway across Florence before you managed to give them the slip, and they had guns! This particular villain only has a pit full of hungry, venomous snakes. You have your brain, your muscles, and your Google Pixel XL case. They'd have to be idiots to bet on the snakes.
One of the snakes attempts to bite you. It has fangs like bayonets, but you have a Google Pixel XL case. You shove the case into its mouth the moment it bites down, and the poor snake's fangs shatter. The case doesn't even get a scratch. There's a reason every agent on this side of the Sahara trusts Google Pixel XL cases to keep their gear safe.
The other snakes decide to try their luck. You don't have quite enough Google cases to deal with all of them simultaneously, but you still have your wits and your agility. You jump, slide, and dodge as the snakes attack. Not a single one of them gets to sample your flesh. A few of them do bite each other, though, which is just as good as dealing with them yourself. Your mentor always told you that you should never fight your enemies when you can get them to fight each other. He was talking about people, but apparently the advice also applies to snakes.
One snake hesitates. You pick it up and clamber out of the pit. Your nemesis is standing right there, looking surprised. The fool. He thought the snakes could kill you. He looks even more surprised when you toss the snake in his face and stride out the door. He probably wishes he had a Google Pixel XL case, but honestly, if he were the sort of person who planned ahead and got the right gear, he would've had something more impressive than a snake pit. You would turn back to see what happened to him, but you have a flight to catch. Hopefully there won't be any snakes on the plane.
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